In the following essay I’ll describe nurturance of one’s waveform of self – using the analogy of a healthy candle flame for one’s ‘inner child[1]’ spirit.
Our form, the result of photons both reflected and emitted – expresses our state of health from the inside out.
Our ‘inner child’ is the being at our core of self who first drew breath and became whole as individuated person at birth. As it grew, when its world first formed, with successive lessons, layers like an onion are formed.
Each layer obscures the one beneath it.
Consider the candle. It has a flame, a wick, candle wax and a base to stay upright. To ‘burn’ and cast light, it must have oxygen and be lit.
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A flame exists in an ongoing equilibrium between chemical reaction of the wick, usually made of tightly woven cotton and liquefied wax (carbon polymer).
As wax melts by the heat of the flame, it liquefies, then vaporizes the wax at the base.
in the presence of continued ambient oxygen, 02[2], the wick draws vaporized wax (a flame’s digested resource) upwards as it is lighter. This feeds the flame. Lets call oxygen “interest” and flame “hope”- a wish of spirit.
Thus fed, the flame produced is a stream of hot photons. CO2 (oxidized carbon), and H2O (hydrogenated oxygen) are byproducts.
The type of flame (passion), its temperature and color, produced depends on wick weave (inherent digestive capacity) and wax structure (what the flame is fed).
Wicks can be round, square, or ribbon. While all candles give light, when well wicked, when wick and wax are in optimized ratio – candlelight can cast very helpful light.
You could say, a well-matched beeswax candle (wick to candle thickness) is akin to a body in healthy integrity – demonstrated objectively as happy and productive.
When a wax has impurities including water, it cools the flame and makes it sooty.
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Wax is made of esterified fat. These can be from insect (beeswax), animal (tallow), vegetable oils (like corn or soy), or petroleum (paraffin).
Each type of wax has its unique properties. Because tallow is very smoky (full of impurities), and those vegetable-based are usually stabilized with paraffin, I’m focusing on beeswax and paraffin which are most commonly used.
Beeswax, being from bees, ‘likes’ to be busy. Derived from honeycomb, it must first be rendered over a low slow flame that melts but doesn’t burn. Like “good” parenting, this process itself, is energy expending- and requires patience with as little emotion.
As wax is lighter than water, melted, it rises. The then purified, honey-free wax can be skimmed for candlemaking. “Honey” symbolizes sweet and cloying emotions- so with your spirit flame – don’t overdo it.
If our chemist is impatient, she or he might try to rush the process – leaving too much honey mixed in with the wax.
The melted ‘fuel’ can’t evenly feed the flame with its pockets of sweet carbohydrate. Already having water in it (“hydrate”), our equation is shifted [3]– to the left, not the right.
Recall every observed process is in a state of chemical and energetic equilibrium.
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Beeswax, the fatty byproduct exuded by bees along their lateral and backside, is slower burning relative to paraffin.
As it has a higher melting point (takes more heat to melt) than paraffin, it has more free energy available to be useful. Also its flame is at a higher temperature than paraffin so it burns more of its fuel efficiently and gives off less soot – undigested hydrocarbons CnH2n+2.
Of course, in the real world, nothing is perfect alkane; which is why there’s hue to it.
Paraffin, derived from petroleum oil- ancient decomposed organic deposits, is softer and burns more rapidly. It melts at a lower temperature. So paraffin is more like pablum[4] with less free energy, than bees wax. It also gives off more soot-undigested partially oxidized (useless) goop.
Consider this akin to a diet of refined foods– one that without additives, is tasteless and lacks texture.
Because paraffin takes to being colored and scented well, additives are used – themselves impurities. Many studies show paraffin candles release fused and unburned components as volatile organic compounds and polycyclic hydrocarbons (PAH)- known to be carcinogens.
(Likewise, it is no surprise a child fed ~crap doesn’t add back much useful spirit (light) to his or her collective.)
Both beeswax and paraffin are solid at room temperature. Candles, as mentioned can also be made from soy and lard- but the latter smokes- so isn’t often used; the former is usually mixed with paraffin, so isn’t “natural” as advertised. I’m not going to dwell on them.
Why do I bring this up? Because the qualities of the flame – whether it burns evenly and cleanly has to do with both the ambient conditions and the qualities of its fuel. Just like our little kid inside is immersed in milieu, and affected by sensory, including verbal[5] surroundings. This is true for our wave forms too.
As advances in neurology continue to prove links between the gut, microbiome, inflammation, and behaviors- paying attention to what we eat (and the company we eat it in- including media), is being shown to be important to our health.
Let the flame be a metaphor for our passion’s “intelligence” as it is helpfully applied to one’s outside world to bring light and warmth to others. With flame producing water as well, e-motions are engaged and involved.
Studies show kids engaged with their emotions (positively), as in having fun, they learn much more quickly.
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Ideally, a well-made candle when lit burns steadily without wavering.
When a candle burns, it creates an updraft- sucking in oxygen at the bottom and releasing its heat, light, and water. On earth it is visible as a tapering teardrop shape.
For that, it needs fresh oxygen and gentle ventilation -so as to bring in fresh O2 and disperse CO2 and water. (A flame on earth makes a shape similar to Yod’s י- hand of G-d). As it is He who answers to a prayer- made when ones flame is stressed.
When a flame flares or sputters, or otherwise burns inefficiently, something is out of balance. Perhaps the wick, analogous to digestive enzymes- isn’t drawing the wax (a “meal”) evenly. Being of earth, no wick is ”perfect”.
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When a wick is (too) big for the candle, it is said to be “over –wicked”- meaning the wick is too long or too fat for the size of candle. Then it burns too quickly, causing (wild) flaring, excess heat and smoke. Then melted wax builds up and spills. The active fuel can’t burn fast enough- so it jumps excitedly and smokes, clouding the local atmosphere.
Then it drips if it’s a taper- a dipped candle without a container. While it might create light, it leaves a messy puddle surrounding its base on table.
Or as a bright mind not given enough to ‘chew’ on, becomes restless- and may spill over – focusing on ‘work ‘- not their own.
When a “meal” (the candle size) is too thin for the digestive juices (the wick)- a body’s resources – such as burns its carbons, fat or sugar (too) quickly. Chemically there’s a loss of free energy, which then isn’t useful. The wick then often turns into a misshapen club-like structure, which can be seen at the base of the flame.
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Compare that to under-wicking – when a wick (digestive ability) is too small for candle’s size. Then a deep pool is created – leaving unused candle like a tunnel around it. This drowns the wick, eventually snuffing it before the candle’s time.
This happens when a waveform being is given more than it can process. Then sluggishness and confusion ensue. (Or like when we have a synesthesia).Then the inner child can’t quite “keep up”.
When one is chronically over “nourished”- given more than it needs for its ‘digestive’ capacity, then instead of using fuel efficiently- it becomes solid storage (fat)- or is let go (wasted) as feces.
(A sign of this is having feces so dense, they sink rather than float- even true for teenage boys who are given a badge of attention for their gigantic toilet-stopping turds (until they get to high school, where then the attentions unwanted.)
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Perhaps there’s too much or too little ventilation – analogous to the ‘winds’ of change- when our ambient state is forced to shift from internal or external disruptions- including gas-lighting by others.
Then candle might blow out or be at least temporarily suffocated. While every organism needs “stress” in order to grow, too much -and anger or anxiety is produced. This is a sign of hormonal reaction (both are the result of secondary chemicals released from the initial sensory information). This trains (a healthy) one to avoid and avert said stimulus, which in the long run, might be counter-productive. (Even though people can say and do awful things- try not to “throw baby out with the bath water”). Everyone has a message of gold – once in a while.
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When breezes are too strong for the flame, one might be tempted to place a protective “chimney” or windscreen all the way around it – such as a glass separator.
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While initially this is stabilizing, in time this will limit its oxygen (what organisms use to create free energy) and their tangible and measurable outcomes. Here a directional windscreen might be more successful – to partially limit winds coming from a particular direction.
(It’s ok to ignore those who are unkind -not kin-like). Or one can choose to be al(l)-one. (alone)
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Blow too hard – such as when one’s inner being experiences “catastrophe” and “devastation”- a candle might go out.
Here is where “united we stand” or “divided we fall” comes into play.
It is much easier to blow a single candle out than one surrounded by others. Candles in close proximity tend to re-light one another. Saturated with vaporized fuel, they are called inflammable (spontaneously combustible).
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Even in the best of circumstances, no wick is actually perfectly made. Wicks are a fiber, an agricultural product subject to small variations, along with the wax surrounding it, each of which affect a flame’s behavior. At times these ‘variances’ can cause a candle to suddenly flicker, go up and down, flaring and dimming.
AS it burns unevenly, even the best candles smoke.
(I’d call this PMS in another life- but might really be moon’s tides and earth’s rotation affecting our ascendant sign- our personality.)
Candles, in their holder, after smoking for a while, create a ring of soot around them (and above too). This is a grimy sticky oily substance that is hard to remove.
While you could move the candle to another location, chances are it will do the same- but not always, so it’s worth a try.
Ultimately the flame, in a stable environment, returns to steady emission (and less inefficient smoking). So please during difficult times, be patient with kind words. Coax gently.
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While some candles are poured into a form with a wick suspended in the middle of it, others are sequentially dipped.
The dipping wax mustn’t be too hot lest it melt the candle already formed underneath. Likewise, avoid preparing meals and while engaging in a diet too spicy and passionate. For example while preparing meals, don’t yell or be angry.
Or instead you’ll thin, not build, your candle body.
When layers are too thick, as flames melt layer by layer, this again, might cause sputtering. Eating too much at any one meal is overly sating and diminishes one’s curiosity and questing spirit.
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Rarely, is a candle able to stand alone – but these “pillars” exist, albeit they are a small percentage of candles made. More often candles are the tapers with free tips, or ones placed in a container with or without a lid.
Unless the candle is votive or pillar, sitting on a platform, dipped candles are usually placed in a holder. This keeps the candle upright. Having a container for our ambitions and drives – such as a person or place to help us process and focus, is a good thing. You could call this a quiet time.
Poorly held, a perfectly made candle might fall over –randomly igniting flammable objects around it.
So it is well- no matter how self sufficient our candle may seem, to be mentored and supervised by an ad-ult (one reaching their “ultimate” maturity)- and not just peers!
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Notice the flame, regardless of circumstances, is always moving, reaching, and twisting. (Unless it’s in outer space- in which case it becomes rounded and globular.) You see the flame is gravity dependent- and hot air rises carrying its photons along.
Its important for the corporeal being to move freely –and not try to hold any one position for too long- lest it ‘think’ it’s stuck in a suffocating glass bauble.
While there’s no need for excessive exertion, regular gentle exercise is essential.
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Once in a while, a candle flame will go out. Being already warmed, in it’s group- it’s inflammable – meaning can spontaneously reignite from the other candles closely around it. So this may be temporary.
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There is a special physics to describe candles’ resilience in groups– you know how hard it is to blow them out together on cake at once! Yet if a group is over-wicked and flickering, sometimes it’s better to separate, snuff, and re-dip it once more.
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Sadly though, sometimes the spark has been gone too long. Or maybe had cold water thrown on it. It can’t reignite without direct intervention; it might first have to dry. When it’s dry again, it needs a lit match- even those “pillars”- you know, the candles that seem to be stout, independent, and robust.
But once carefully addressed with T.L.C. (lit), and its directional screen, it is then ~good as new- at least in terms of lighting ability.
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Over time, all candles eventually reach their bottom. They’ve lit their world for other’s; their “designated” time’s up. When a candle goes out- it cools the others around them; they as a result, aren’t as flammable. When a candle goes out, there’s bound to be a lot of smoke – wax and impurities that didn’t get fully metabolized. Stench and soot tend to lie thickly in the air for quite a while – sometimes for days (weeks, or months).
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So it’s best to sweeten a diet of ‘fat’, as we age – supporting efficient combustion. Let go of extra colors and additives. Stick to beeswax candles is my (humbled) advice.
Lastly, as is true of any and everything, we are already our complete candle’s projection – meaning we are already everything. There are no mistakes or accidents, in hindsight we can forgive ourselves.
(I wrote this the day before our friend was found down but am only able to edit it now.)
[1] After birth, the inner child is successively covered by experiences that act as limiting beliefs (I call them bee leafs – protective coverings helping us stay in our parent’s labyrinthine grooves. Without heeding parents’ rules, we might be ostracized. – In many places, being separated from our tribes could lead to “death”- which ostracizing meant in past millennia.
[2] You could think of O2 as Samech (or Vau) squared – which aids manifestation from Yesod’s treasure house of images. Oxygen has much free energy available in it’s double bond. When bonds are split, as energy transfers to a less energetic state such as water and CO2, it gives off light and heat. When heat is desired, such as with a gas stove pilot light , seeing anything other than blue, is a sign of inefficiency.
[3] One chemical equation for a flame looks roughly like this:(CnH2n+2
+ nO2 =(really back and forth arrow symbols for reciprocal equilibrium) (CO2 )n+ (H2O) n
[4] Pablum was a Mead Johnson baby cereal made in the 1930s. It was developed when babies became malnourished -after breastfeeding became unfashionable in the middle and upper classes. Now it refers to an intellectual diet that is bland, insipid, and infantile.
[5] Verbal information is measurable and tangible. Vibrations act on not only the eardrum, but from activation of cellular mechanosensors (built in ‘springs’ in each cell). Each consonant has energy, as well as the vowels they contain.
