I got an apology once, but I didn’t get any version of “no” or similar negative. So before entering the dating pool, as that is what prompted it, I was hoping for resolution and clarity.

Today I composed and followed through with the following letter. Perhaps you’ll find it amusing. If there were three qualities I’d have said, “no” to, he meets all three -being a player’, having a certain name, and being a chiropractor. Which is also why this is so funny.

******

Dear Habibi,

Yet again I reach out to you as I continue to be flooded with intense sensations that seem attached to your eyes and lips. I want to move on with my life. It’s been more than 5 years since we met. Please respond even if you feel comfortable ghosting and ignoring me.

To this end, I enclose the following S.A.S.E. so you can choose an option, sign, and send a response.

(line of detachment)

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for all your attention over the years, but I no longer wish to hear from you in any way shape or form – as I indicated through my staff before. I hope your confusion eases. Please do go get a life!

Be well,

Dr. Habibi ___________________________

 *********************************************************** (detach here)

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for all your attention but I am not in a place to explore any relationship with you. Please go meet someone new!

Be free!

Dr. Habibi ____________________________

******************************************************** (detach here)

 (This one is favored by my sons):

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for all you attention but you’re not in my lane. You’re messed up. Nonetheless, I still need you to feel attached to me for an eternity though I’m not going to budge. Knowing you are out there pining away and “wanting” me, feeds my ego. And I like power tripping! Too bad for you. I really don’t care.

Be well,

Dr. Habibi _________________________________

******************************************************** (detach here)

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for all your attention. I don’t know how to say this, but I did fall for you and hard. Then you went crazy and said all kinds of weird stuff and your writing is over the top. I’m still coming to terms with that. I’ll give you a call one of these (please circle) days, weeks, months, years. 

Be well!

Dr. Habibi ______________________________________

****************************************************** (detach here)

Or write your own:

Dear Jennifer,

Be well!

Dr.Habibi _________________________________________

*****

What do you think he’ll think of that?

I should add, which I’ve included in all my correspondence to him, as this was a similar response I gave to male patients that claimed they were attracted to me – but I was not to them (and already in a committed relationship):

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for your kind attention. I’m sorry for any confusion, but I am not available.

Whatever attractive good you see in me – is also a part of you as we perceive best what we already know. I have no doubt you will find your right mate and match.

Consider my words and actions as a roadmap into new terrain- even as they don’t light your way.

Be well,

Dr. Habibi

****************************************************

All is Inshallah.

Here’s what my Reiki master sent to me when she read it (and I vouch I have already done what she said- and am willing to do another cord-cutting again!)

“I read your letters on LinkedIn. You are the most transparent person I know. Wow! Definitely “too much” for this playboy to continue in any way or form. I’d drop him like a “rancid, wormy hot potato!” Do your own chord cutting with a sharp knife and a rag. I don’t see how the continued dream sex can serve you any longer with the damage it may be doing to your person.

I don’t see this man ever measuring up to you. It’s more likely you’ll meet a galactic God to match your Goddess after the solar flash. By then you will have healed around “men” and be in an open state for true love if you desire.

Love you dear friend!

K”

I reassured her that his advances are only above the sternum. I have done cord cuttings and more. In fact, the energy rushes are getting stronger. I feel held in long embraces which terrified me before.

**

And no, he didn’t respond. I’ve decided even though I’ve got a friend who claims to have seen him, he must be dead – his soul has turned to ash and spirit is in the nether. How else could someone be so unkind?

I also sent him the following:

Ultimately he has chosen to continue to ghost me. No explanation. Because of my over-developed sense of responsibility, I shared my situation with the man I ‘matched’ with. He, understandably, thinks I “should work it out with L.D.”

But in the process gave me his birth info which was really interesting. It was very similar to a man I once really thought I loved when I was an adolescent. He’s a retired swamp biologist – which doesn’t surprise me at all. He understands the Voodun’s Loa.

On a whim, having discovered my L.D. the man’s full middle name, I searched Google for a birth date – and I got one from the department of licensing! Not at all what I was expecting: he’s a Leo – so comfortable with being haughty and loves an audience. Very little – besides our Venuses line up; our nodes trine.

I’m not sure what to make of that (I always asked the universe to ‘give me someone totally different than me’) – so we could learn from each other which this would suggest. But I realize, it’s more he’s not interested at all- just some cruel guy. maybe he thinks I’m dangerous.

Meanwhile I may (or may not) have a friend from Match.