It is really hard to answer this other than by process of elimination. If you’re in a hurry, skip to the end.

Any favorite month would likely include my favorite holiday – as I add and weigh which ones I like more and less of. Here’s my mini inventory based on my experience living in North America.

September was always a month of anticipation – for what the fall and winter season would bring. As a kid it was the start of school year. I’d get to meet new ‘classes’. It was fun to meet new collectives – but always stressful. I’d usually get sick for at least a couple of weeks.

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I never liked Halloween with its ghosts and goblins and  having to dress up like someone else. Though I’d usually chose a “gypsy” while I was young. A part of my heart certainly was one! This was a chance to show an otherwise non-ordinary part of myself.

One year in college, everyone in my dorm was dressing up; I felt pressured to participate. I dressed as a “wimp”. (I wore close fitting clothes, my black leotards, bound by scarves around each joint. Their ends were flying. I could swirl a little.

Could have (would have/should have) named myself a ‘wafting Aikido dancer’- would have been more appropriate – letting others use their force against themselves, while I twirled away – but didn’t think of this at the time. Luckily few asked what my costume was so I didn’t have to say it much. A few did and then laughed uncomfortably.

And of course, in October is when I met the man whose energy signature has since perfidiously tormented me- so, October’s out.

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In November, there’s Thanksgiving. I love Thanksgiving for its family feeling. I love sitting around a table sharing a meal. It’s inclusive. For a moment the we stop using syllables and vowels, while we stuff with food and make contented sounds.

It is nice to see family – even if I don’t see them any other time of the year which often feels like a blessing. For years that felt like my high holiday.

In third, fourth, and fifth grade, I l’oved saying the grace- in French. Then everyone’s quiet, even if focused on what they’ll taste for their first bite.

But now I don’t have family around; instead I bless my own meals and incorporate Thanksgiving into my‘year-round’ life. I forgot -and can’t find my French prayer which was quintessentially mellifluous.

And face it, in November, the leaves have littered the ground with a mess – and it’s easier to step in one, especially if you’re a dog owner.

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I love December’s snow and lacy frosts, with dark starry nights set off by lights, cheerful songs and everything Christmas. It’s a close second too. Joyful music is ~everywhere, if you listen for it. The time lifts my heart even though we’re immersed in weeks of cold gloom.

But gifts, presents, and their messes – including disappointed expectations between siblings especially, can take away from its joys.

And again, it’s really cold. You have to put on so many layers. The pleasure is more for my head – than corpus. Maybe that will change.

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In January, a time of deep freeze and when everything seems dead- gone are Christmas festivities. There’s nothing going on. Skiers probably find January a great month. Me not so much. Nor does President’s Day ring my bell. Otherwise, late winter is a great for writing and introspection- sitting still under a wrap with a mug of chocolate. Or would, if chocolate didn’t make me feel jittery.

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In February, while I love the idea of l’ove and romance- and Valentine’s Day is always a sure pick-me-up with its red hearts and candy chocolates, its impressions are fleeting. Until I met my ex-, I would have sworn there wasn’t a romantic bone in my body. He showed me the value and fun of a lovely romantic evening- we celebrated several of them, but I’ve had none since.

And one day of festivities barely outweighs the land’s grim condition. And too, it was when my father chose to transition. MLK’s holiday is bittersweet. You can guess where this is going.

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My favorite month of the year used to happen in early spring –along with my birthday In March. As a very young child, my parent’s celebrated me, even though it was otherwise complicated.

Outside the lights are stronger with sun rising higher each day. Birds start singing again.  You can sense winter’s grip is resolving. Hearing birds is my favorite sound of all – other than hearing my own voice – or my son’s when he visits.

In March, I can go outside without as much effort though walks can be slushy. The earth is coming to bloom again- at least in Northern Hemisphere. There’s a steady sense of gain – sometimes including around my waist- after all comfort holiday’s meals and desserts. Even though I complain, I guess I’m glad its time for Lent’s start of forty days – I start being more mindful.  It’s easy to get carried away by spring fever as it starts to build; I’ve a tendency to overdo.

Since Lent is basically a downer; March isn’t my favorite.

While I’m a trickster – can morph ideas, I’ve never been good at April Fool’s jokes. Usually they play them on me – reminding me of my painful tendency towards gullibility.

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The rest of spring kind of blurs together.  My mother and I weren’t close so May’s Mother’s Day’s no hit- even though I love the flowers. As I’m no fan of death holidays like June’s Memorial Day though Juneteenth may redeem it.

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Being more houseplant than hu(e)-man in actions, I go outside as ~little as possible. But I have fun if I do – even if I’m not doing much more than gazing and breathing.

Invariably my mood lifts-and my body loves summer – because I go outside ~daily. But not too much of it- and little direct sun. (I’m a bit orchid-like- late blooming, don’t need much light; I hardly need water at all – just throw on an ice cube every once in a while and I’ll bloom.)

At this point in my life, with a home and gardens, come July I’ve got a long list of chores. If I don’t want landscape to go bananas, I need to keep after it.

Maybe I have the most fun (dopamine) whenever I go out as my mind is more focused and less mentally engaged. I feast my eyes on little stuff  and no edges with clutter.

June and July I’m in full swing – with greens and strawberries then raspberries, apples and plums. It seems I’m always harvesting something- and processing into late August.

Even if I love the firework’s displays, I don’t like the mess they make – with sulfurous odors and loud noises – so July has that strike against it. But it’s a great month for picnicking and taking long walks with sunscreen.

Of the two, August may well be my favorite along with my new “favorite” holiday -or will be, if I continue to celebrate it. This year I made a new one – called “Becoming One”.

“Becoming One” is my personal holiday -so far. The idea flashed “become one in five weeks” – to ‘get ready’, which for me happened to be August 5.

With a sort of hesitant anticipation, I celebrated it by lighting a candle, dabbing with holy water and singing my name’s soul song. And probably a couple more- I’m working on a repertoire of personal ones. The same ones keep coming to me.

Then had a small cake-like food to ‘consummate my matrimony’ of ~alchemical G-d being. I had a special libation; for me that usually means bubbly. I was going to get Champagne but settled for something else. I have to start somewhere and hope to do it again.

Even if I’m my aura still feels like it’s expanding with Love Daemon’s spirit self- it’s steadying. Celebrate yourself! – The more the merrier.